Wiley - Cash In My Pocket

Did someone say 'Credit Crunch'?

Wiley doesn't think so. Check out this unofficial video viral to publicize his next single 'Cash In My Pocket'. The track's produced by Mark Ronson and features vocals by Daniel Merriweather.

Tune... Tune....Tune!

Props to MC Gordon Brown. BBBBRRRRAAAAAAAP! etc

What if Beyonce was one of us...?

I get a little bit over excited when big pop stars are on the come back. This excitement is usually short lived when said new music is heard...highly true in Beyonce's case.

She is peddling a new double A side at the moment, If I were a Boy/Single Ladies (banal ballad/booty shaking shouty mess).

The first time I heard 'If I were a Boy', I was certain i'd heard it before. The melody, the structure, the strummy guitar. What does it remind me of?

Beyonce - If I were A Boy (New)
by Le-Tour-2Lor

Hmm, strummy, inoffensive, middle of the road, Alanis Morrisete-esq, rhyming dictionary lyrics, mum friendly...WAIT A MINUTE! Cast your mind back to 1995 . . . . . .



Or is it just me? If my name was Joan Osbourne I wouldn't be best pleased.

The Brown Eyed curse

Now, this post isn't what some of you may be thinking...(disgusting)

I am of course talking about the ditty 'Brown Eyed Girl' by Van Morrison.

A fairly non-offensive song on the surface but this song is my own personal hell...

I play keyboards in a covers band, a highly successful covers band at that. We try to be a bit different so edge away from traditional cover band fare and instead try new stuff. A bit of Dizzee here, a Prodigy and 90's dance medley there, but obviously we touch on the traditional Beatles/Abba/Jackson 5 tripe.

One such tripe track in our repertoire is 'Brown Eyed Girl'. I have probably played this song 68,156 times (approx) in the past few years. I've got to the stage with it where i've played it so often that I've started to forget the chords, structure, and lyrics. I blag my way through it singing the odd word I remember and mumbling my way through the rest before the (sadly) unforgettable chorus kicks in. It's like my brain has had enough of it and is slowly deleting it bit by bit.

We have started to leave it out of our sets but to no avail.

You can guarantee that at every gig we play, someone will request this dire song. Usually an inebriated female screeching that it's, 'her favourite song because she too has brown eyes' (crazy). When we succumb to the mind bending torture and start playing it, the audience goes nuts. Literally everyone stands up, dances and sings along to the 'la la la la la' bits.

What the hell is it about this track that makes it so popular? Is Van Morrison some kind of musical hypnotist, packing this track with hidden messages in attempt to recruit some kind of hazel eyed female army? Or are people that love this song running on minimal brain cells?

Have a look at this video of Van performing the track and read the second comment down from 83smileyface.

I despair, and rest my case.

The Family - Channel 4

Channel 4's 'The Family' is now in its 4-5 episode and sadly, I love it.

But why? This is a question I really can't find an answer for, so am instead just going to raise a few things I find fascinating about this programme.

I like. . .

- The way the cameras are the same colours as the walls they are attached to. Nice work. Subtle.

- The way that whenever there is a huge drama in the house (and there are many), we are shown a picture of the families cat sitting and looking a little perplexed at the action unfolding infront of it. Poor bastard.

- The fact that none of the kids look like the father but they ALL look like mini clones of the mother in a weird 'Children of the Corn', manner.

- The way that the word 'bedtime' seems to be the catalyst for nearly every argument.

- The fact that the family are from Canterbury, which is where I went to university. The reason I enjoy this is down to the middle child Emily. She's the one who goes out clubbing till half 2 every night and from my knowledge of Canterbury she can only be going to one place. A place which I avoided beyond belief as its an utter shit hole. Hello Baa Bars... She looks like a regular.

- The way that the dad thinks that he is some kind of superhuman parent and amazing husband when infact he is a saxophone playing megalomaniac who is hell bent on making his kids lives horrific. How he managed to bag his hottie wife is a total mystery.

Russell Brand

Russell Brand is the kind of comedian/TV star/actor/presenter who i've obviously always known exists, but who i've always just sort of greeted with a 'meh', response.

I've tried listening to him on BBC Radio 2 (meh), watching him act in Forgetting Sarah Marshall (meh) and in presenter mode on the MTV:VMA's (meh). The word controversy seems to follow him around for no other reason than he is a bit metro sexual, likes sex and wears tight trousers.

Last night, in curious, 'but everyone else loves him', mode I went with some mates to see him test out some new stand up at The Pleasence in the highly depressing Caladonian Road.

After having our phones checked into the cloakroom for risk of any of Russell's new material appearing on youtube, we squeezed into the tiny theatre.

Russell bounded out looking as you'd expect: black T-shirt, black cardigan and black trousers that look like they'd be a total arse to take off. He had a stand next to him with notes on it clearly indicating that this is a work in progress.

...and, it was fantastic. The comedy was spot on and seemingly highly personal. He had no worries showing off his vulnerability, and he does come across as a vulnerable person (which I really didn't expect), but what really surprised me was his utterly fantastic knowledge and intelligence about a seemingly never ending range of subjects. His mind would wander off on a tangent about, for example, Mother Teresa, and he would quite happily and easily pull out quotes, facts and figures about the lady in question, seemingly plucking them from nowhere. Also his vocabulary - engaging, extensive and on the odd occasion bewildering. I've never heard someone use the word aplomb so often and so naturally.

If you get a chance, go and see him! It is easy to see why he was at one time the 7th most Googled thing.